In The Mist
by CurlyQAngel
Summary: Harry has just spent a part of his summer at the Dursley's being ignored and wallowing in his misery's. Things begin to change however when he is picked up by members of the Order and leaves to spend his summer at the Burrow. Relationships are changing, a
1. In The Mist

Summary: This story starts off in the summer after the 5th book. IT CONTAINS SPOILERS. If you don't want to know what happened in the 5th book, I recommend that you don't read this. Other than that, I'm not too sure where this is going, so that's all!  
  
In this darkness you call night  
  
In this darknees I call life  
  
Call my name into the dark  
  
Send a light of hope and want  
  
As I hide there in the mist  
  
You can't see me  
  
I don't exsist  
  
In my mind I spend my day s Wondering how things can change  
  
From light there came dark  
  
From dark came my sorrows  
  
And in this never ending darkness  
  
I can drown here in these sorrows.  
  
Harry shrugged on his jacket and opened the door to his room without caring how much noise he made. It didn't matter anymore. Nothing did. He walked slowly down the stairs, past the living room where his aunt and uncle were sitting watching the evening news, though as he passed their attention turned to him.  
  
"That boy hasn't said a word since we picked him up at the train station five days ago!" Petunia said, looking over at her husband Vernon.  
  
"Eh, it's better that way. He's writing to those.people, isn't he?" Vernon asked, looking slightly panicked at the thought of having Moody and the others show up at his house. What would the neighbors think with the likes of them walking around?  
  
Petunia too now looked slightly unsure. "Well.we've been treating him perfectly fine! There's no reason for him not to have written! Of course he has!" she said, sounding a lot surer than she felt. The both looked at each other, wondering but not saying aloud what would happen if those people ever showed up on Privet Drive.  
  
While Vernon and Petunia were discussing their own problems in the living room, Harry had walked out the front door and was now walking slowly down the street, his hands in his pockets and his head down. He didn't want to talk to anyone. Earlier he had dragged himself out of bed to right a quick note to Moody saying that he was fine and sent it off with Hedwig earlier. The last thing that he wanted was the entire Order to show up at his door and start asking questions. Harry didn't want to deal with them. He didn't want to talk to them.  
  
Turning at the end of the street, Harry headed towards the park. It was late, and a brisk breeze had fallen over the town, but he didn't care. The cold didn't bother him, though not much did anymore. Everyday was going through the actions. Waking up in the morning, forcing food into his stomach. Basic human needs. Nothing more, but just enough to survive. Harry wouldn't even have bothered trying to maintain contact with the wizarding world if it wasn't for the fact that a group of highly capable wizards would come swooping down on his door step if he didn't.  
  
He tried to think back to the days when that was what he wanted, to be taken away from the place that he was forced to call home, but everything seemed so long ago. It was all so different now, more so than it normally was. He knew now why he had to go back to Privet Drive. It was the only way that he could remain protected from Voldermort. It made sense, but the irony was there. The one place in the world that he couldn't stand was the same place that would save him for however long it lasted.  
  
An owl hooted in the distance, and Harry ignored it. Subconsciously he knew that there were no owls in Britain, especially around Privet Drive, unless it was Hedwig or another owl coming to deliver something. Hedwig flew down, landing on Harry's hunched shoulders as she affectionately nibbled at his ear. Harry automatically lifted an arm to pet her a few times before it dropped down heavily by his side again.  
  
"What if I don't want this!" Harry screamed into the night as he stopped in the middle of the park. "What if I don't want to be ME anymore! What if I don't want to be a wizard!" he screamed again, not caring if anyone was around to hear him. He no longer cared what they thought though. Nothing seemed to matter anymore as it was all removed from him, removed from affecting him.  
  
Harry glared forward into the night, angry with it for not answering his questions that he had thrown to it. He had grown so much in the last year, yet he still felt as if he was a young boy, stuck in a cupboard under stairs, hoping and dreaming of a way out, of a world that he could escape from the torture that he lived in.  
  
There was no way that he could have known what his life was going to be like though. No way to know that he was going to be forced to fight for his life, or die while leaving the wizarding world to perish that the hands of him. His shoulders sagged, the weight of the world on him. If he didn't win that final battle with Voldermort, whenever it came, the world would indeed fail. And it would all be his fault. Would he in turn become the boy that died? The boy that left us all for dead? Or just the boy. The boy that ruined it all for us. The boy that let You-Know-Who alive.  
  
Harry walked toward a swing and sat in it, pushing back and forth gently while Hedwig fluttered to the top of the swings. His body may have been at the park, but his mind was miles away, thinking of the day when he thought that he was saved, the day that he found out that he was a wizard. Harry thought that his life was going to be fine from then on and that he wouldn't have any more worries. He was with people of his kind and he could start over again. It all turned out so terribly wrong. What had he done to deserve what life had thrown at him? He had been through so much in his life in such a short time. It was times like these that he felt as if he should have a coupon to redeem, allowing him a lifetime free of hassles for he had been through enough as it was already.  
  
No such luck. Harry was still a boy and five minutes earlier, he became a 16-year-old boy. So much time had passed when he had left the house, but the Dursley's didn't bother with him anymore and he didn't bother with them. It was better that way. Harry wanted the time to himself, the time to think and wonder when his life had taken such an unaccepted course.  
  
His thoughts finally drifted to the one place that he didn't want it to go the most. Sirius Black. The man that Harry was finally getting to know. The only family that he had left. The only person that really cared for him, and him alone, as if Harry was his own child. The pain was still so unbearable. He had finally admitted to himself that there was no way to see Sirius again, and it was killing him inside. He would have been able to go through all of it, twice, if Sirius was still there. Sirius was his support, the one that let him go through it all and helped him in the end, for he was always there for Harry.  
  
Not anymore. Harry was once more alone as he had been before he met Sirius, only this time it was a million times worse. Knowing that there had been someone out there for him and losing him, physically, right in front of his own eyes was so much different. And Harry still blamed himself. Dumbledore had spent many a time trying to tell Harry that it hadn't been his fault that Sirius died, but Harry pushed it all away. He knew that it was his fault. If he hadn't been so foolish to believe what he had heard and seen, Sirius would be there right then, trying to get Harry off Privet Drive.  
  
"Why? Damn you, why? Why did it have to be like this? Why can't I be left ALONE? All I want is Sirius back. Please, that's all I ask. All I ask." Harry said, sobbing as the words left his mouth. He had started off passionate until his voice went down to barely a whisper. He was alone. Forever more alone. 


	2. In The Mist Part Two

So what does it matter  
  
What I want to do  
  
All the paths that I take  
  
They all just lead to you.  
  
So what does it matter  
  
If I turn away today  
  
You know that tomorrow  
  
Is going to be the same.  
  
This world is so defined  
  
All my movements' chosen  
  
And I chose to hide here in this mist  
  
And tomorrow I'll still exist.  
  
---  
  
Hedwig looked down from the top of the swing set, seeing him there, head down, trembling slightly from the pressure of his sobs. The young boy. The old man. The teenager that was in the midst of a time of fun, a time of joy. No more. For now he was a man forced into a world of demons and danger. A world that never stopped for him, until the moment where his destiny would be fulfilled, and the conclusion written. For he was just that. A story to be passed down generation to generation as people awed at his power. But for the boy, and his friends, the world around them was anything but a story. It was life.  
  
---  
  
"Has [i]anyone[/i] heard from Harry?" Hermione asked Ron over the phone that he had finally learned to use a week earlier.  
  
"The Order must be getting letters from him. They haven't gone storming onto Privet Drive yet. Hey, what's that beeping noise?" Ron asked, pulling the contraption away from his head and shaking it a bit to see if it was still working. Muggles. They had the strangest ways of communication.  
  
"It's call waiting. Just ignore it, it will go away," Hermione said impatiently. "He can't be okay. He hasn't written at all this summer! That's not like him. The Dursley's obviously aren't keeping him from sending out letters if the Order is getting them. You'd think that he would take the time to write to us," she said, sadness now filling her voice along with worry. She cared for Harry and wondered about him constantly. She had tried calling him, but whenever she did, Harry's uncle told her that Harry wasn't there. "Where could he be." she whispered, more to herself than to Ron on the other end.  
  
"I don't know mate. It's the strangest thing. I keep asking my dad about him but he won't say anything. He just keeps saying 'Harry is fine' over and over again. If he was fine, he would have written to us begging to leave the Dursley's already. I know Harry. He can't stand staying with those nuts any longer than he has too. I'm really worried about him Hermione," Ron said, finally admitting what they both knew was true. "He hasn't said a thing about Sirius to us since he died. That can't be normal. Him keeping it all inside like that. Just imagine going through all that!" he said, shivering at the thought of anyone in his family dying, the thought of his dad in the hospital still fresh in his mind.  
  
"I know Ron," Hermione whispered. "I know."  
  
---  
  
It had been three weeks since Harry had left Hogwarts and began living with the Dursley's again. In those three weeks he hadn't said a word to any of them, and the only time that he communicated with anyone was his letters to the Order stating that he was still alive.  
  
Harry had his suspicions about what the Order was doing out there. They must have figured out that he wasn't normal. It wasn't as if he was hiding it. He hadn't made any requests to leave the house and to go live with the Dursley's. All his letters said were "I'm fine" with a scribbled signature at the bottom. Some days, even that act was too much for Harry, but the thought of the wizards swooping down on him convinced him to move.  
  
Harry lay in a ball, curled up on his bed. Subconsciously he knew that they would notice something. He tried to care about what would happen to him, but he just couldn't make himself bother. After all, no matter what he did, wouldn't he still end up having to fight for his life? Did it really matter if he didn't write to the Order for one day? No matter what he did, his life was laid out and destiny was before him. Harry would be fighting one of the two strongest wizards in the world, and there was no way to get around it. He even pondered what would happen if he killed himself. Would he simply come back to life to defeat the Dark Lord? It couldn't be as simple as that, he knew. But Harry knew that he wouldn't do anything that drastic. Too many people were depending on him, and he couldn't let them down no matter what he felt. The story of his life, all in the name of preserving life.  
  
He was still in fetal position when the doorbell rang below him. Harry heard voices below that sounded familiar, but he still didn't move. That was the position that Hermione and Ron found him in when they walked up the stairs and into his tiny bedroom. Harry had heard his door open, but the connection wasn't made that people were actually standing in his room. Even when Ron spoke, it took a beat before Harry opened his eyes and warily turned over.  
  
"Bloody hell. What happened to you mate?" Ron asked, staring in shock at what was his best friend.  
  
"Tact Ron, tact!" Hermione said, hitting him in the sides. She had to admit though, Ron was simply stating what they were both thinking. What happened to their friend that was strong and could get through it all? The boy that was lying in front of them was anything but that.  
  
Harry was pale, weeks of staying inside or only going out at night causing the lively color that was normally there to vanish completely. His eyes had sunk in, telling his two best friends that sleep had been evasive also. He was thin, for eating wasn't something that he cared about. A faint shadow was also beginning to cover his face, appearing more as dirt than the beard that it truly was.  
  
"What." Harry paused, clearing his throat. His voice was weak and scratchy from the weeks of not using it. "What are you doing here?" he asked, avoiding their gaze and turning instead to the pillow that he was laying on.  
  
"Oh Harry," Hermione whispered, rushing over to the bed and pulling Harry into her arms. "We came to get you. Just in time it seems. Why didn't you write? Call? We sent you gifts on your birthday," she said, looking over at the unopened stack of presents that were on Harry's desk.  
  
Harry struggled out of Hermione's grasp, curling up into the corner of his bed still not looking at the two of them. Hermione turned pleading eyes up to Ron, not knowing what to say or do. Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, and Mad-Eye Moony were all waiting downstairs for them. They expected Ron and Hermione to get Harry ready and downstairs relatively quickly. Everyone knew that Harry wasn't doing good, but this was more than anyone had imagined.  
  
Ron looked around the room, not sure what to do either. Spotting Harry's trunk, he went over to it to pack it. Frowning, Ron saw that it was still packed from when Harry had arrived at Privet Drive. Ron looked up at Harry carefully, wondering what to make of all these new developments. He grabbed the few items off Harry's desk and put them into the trunk, pushing it next to the door before going and sitting next to Harry on the bed.  
  
"Listen mate, we're here to take you away. We're going to go to the Burrow for a bit, and then probably Siri - Grimmauld Place," Ron said, mad at himself for almost saying Sirius' name in front of Harry when he knew that it wasn't a good idea.  
  
Harry's head snapped up and he narrowed his eyes at Ron. "No, you can go. I'm going to stay here. I don't want to go.there," he said, leaving it at that and turning to look out the window.  
  
"Harry, come on. You hate it here. At the Burrow you can be with us. We don't even have to go to.that other place if you don't to. Please Harry, it'll be better," Hermione said, trying to soothe him. "You have to come, there are things that need to be done," she added, thinking that telling him that there were duties to be accomplished would be better.  
  
Harry sprang from the bed and started pacing back in front of them, words rapidly spilling from his mouth. "Of course there are things that need to be done! When isn't there something to be done? When am I not needed to do something? Goodness forbid if I want to be ALONE for five minutes of my life. Every move that I make is watched. Everything that I do is monitored. I can't walk out the door without people wondering what I'm doing and where I'm going because it's too 'dangerous' to do anything stupid.  
  
I'm important. I have a destiny. I can't mess that up, because things will crumble right before my very eyes," Harry said, continuing though Hermione and Ron still had no idea about the Prophecy. "And what if I don't come? What if I say no for once? Are you all going to come and attack me?" Harry asked, his voice angry and bitter as he stared at his two friends.  
  
Hermione and Ron were in state of shock. They looked up at Harry, confused about what he was talking about and worried about what was going on with him. Luckily, they didn't have to worry about it anymore. At that moment, the door to the room opened and Remus Lupin walked in quietly.  
  
"Ron, Hermione, thanks. You can go and wait downstairs. Harry and I will join you shortly," he said, smiling at the two as they got up and left the room as fast as they could, shooting worried glances at Harry.  
  
Remus looked at the room, quietly observing the darkness and the disarray that it was all in. He said nothing for a few moments, choosing instead to look at Harry who was still breathing heavily in a corner of the room.  
  
"Sit down, Harry. I have things that you need to know," Remus said, pointing to the bed.  
  
"I don't want to know," Harry said.  
  
"I'm afraid that you don't have much of a choice Harry," Remus replied, his voice sad yet determined. 


	3. In The Mist Part Three

On a day like today  
  
When I think I know  
  
All that's happened to me  
  
Is set in stone.  
  
On a day like today  
  
When I think nothing's changed  
  
I see your eyes  
  
From across the room.  
  
It's on days like today  
  
When things being clearer  
  
I lose my bearings  
  
And you're so much nearer.  
  
---  
  
Harry stood, glaring at Remus. Everyone thought that there was something that he needed to know. There wasn't. Every single time that he learned something new, his life ended up turning upside down. This time he had learned his lesson. He didn't want to know. Voldermort could be walking down street at that moment with 10 dementors, and he still didn't want to know. Besides, Harry reasoned with himself, if Voldermort was near he would know it immediately.  
  
"I assure you, Professor. Whatever it is, I [i]don't[/i] want to know," Harry said, stopping to stare out the open window and the street below as if Voldermort was going to appear right then and there in front of him.  
  
Remus sighed and sat down, placing his head in his hands for a few moments. "Harry, I know how you feel but you can't remain in the past forever - "  
  
Harry swung around immediately looking at Remus carefully. His eyes were shooting daggers as he spoke. "You know how I feel? You know how I [i]feel?![/i] That's rather impossible seeing as half the time I feel nothing at all. There's nothing there. I lost Sirius. The only family that I had left that actually cared about me and you expect me to believe that you understand how I feel? There's nothing there!" Harry screamed, his voice having built power until he reached the breaking point.  
  
Remus stood too, glaring back down at Harry. When he spoke however, his voice was calm, yet forceful. "You've obviously spent a lot of time thinking about yourself Harry and while I can't say that I blame you under the circumstances, you need to realize that you aren't the only one that was affected by Sirius' death.  
  
"Sirius was my best friend from the moment that I entered Hogwarts and he was there for me when I became a werewolf and I had a problem. He was the last friend that I had left. The only one that I hadn't lost to Voldermort, and now I've lost him too Harry. How do you think I feel? I do admit that I am better off because I have more memories of him, but you aren't alone Harry. I'm here. Hermione is here. Ron is here. There is a room full of people down there that is worried about you and care for you. They want to be there for you too. They care for you Harry. We all do," Remus concluded, his voice soft.  
  
Harry stood silently, staring at Remus'. The two looked at each other, not saying anything for long moments. Finally, Harry broke the contact and collapsed on the bed, looking down at the floor. Remus joined him a moment later, also looking down at the floor.  
  
"I'm sorry," Harry said. His voice was full of feeling even as he avoided Remus' gaze. He knew that Remus had a point. Harry had been wallowing in his own misery and it was time to stop thinking about himself and remember the others again.  
  
Remus nodded and patted Harry on the back. "I know you are. It's hard Harry. I'm not going to lie to you and say that it's going to be alright. I have no idea what's going to happen in the future and I'm not going to pretend to either. All I can promise is that I will be here for you whenever you need me, and so will all those others will be too," Remus said.  
  
"I know," Harry whispered quietly all the fight and anger now out of his voice and now it was filled with resignment to what lay before him. It seemed that he needed to be yelled at before he finally slapped out of his self-pitying. "That's not what you wanted to tell me. What is it?" Harry asked, finally looking up at Remus.  
  
"It's about Sirius, Harry. I know that this isn't something that you want to hear about or want to deal with, but you have no choice," Remus said, pausing before he continued again. "Sirius had a will. Yes, we do that in the wizarding world too," Remus said when he saw Harry's look.  
  
"In the will, Sirius left almost everything to you. All the money that he left to you has been split. Half is in your regular account at Gringott's and the other half is in a savings account that you're going to have access to when you're 18," Remus said, stopping again.  
  
"Alright, what's so special about that? The way that you made it sound I thought that it was going to be something.I guess bigger," Harry said with a shrug, slightly confused with what was going on.  
  
"You're right Harry, that's not all. It's the house. It's been left in your name, and you need to decide what to do with it."  
  
Harry closed his eyes leaned his head forward. He knew it was going to come to this. The house. The last place that he was with Sirius before the battle that killed his Godfather. Remus was giving him the option of selling it and not having to go back to it ever again. Obviously Remus understood how Harry felt about the house and the house-elf that came with it. The thought of having to go back there was overwhelming right then and Harry prayed that he didn't have to make a decision right then and there.  
  
"You don't have to decide right now Harry. I would never expect you to make a decision like that right now. I just wanted you to know that it would be coming up eventually, but not right now," Remus said, standing up.  
  
Harry nodded gratefully, standing too with Remus. "I guess I'm being taken away from here?" Harry asked, though he already knew the answer.  
  
"Yes. You've been here long enough, and we all decided that it would be better if you were somewhere that we had our people at to protect you and watch over you. It's safe here, but I think it would be safer with us," Remus said as he cast a spell on Harry's trunk to pack it and moved it out the door and downstairs with his wand.  
  
"Where are we going?" Harry questioned, his voice soft and trembling slightly at the emotions connected with the thought of Sirius' old home.  
  
"Mr. and Mrs. Weasley said that they would be happy for you to come and stay with them if you like. Hermione is going to be there too. Her parents think that you all just wanted to spend the summer together, but she doesn't know the details."  
  
Harry nodded again and started walking out the door, hearing Lupin following him close behind. When they arrived at the bottom of the stairs, Harry saw Hermione and Ron standing in the living room looking uncomfortable, out of place, and worried.  
  
"I'm sorry," Harry whispered softly, knowing that he had scared his friends, the two people that he cared most about. "I didn't mean to yell."  
  
"It's alright mate!" Ron said, happy to have his friend back. "We're just glad to have you back!"  
  
"Don't worry about it, Harry," Hermione said, rushing to give him a hug and holding on longer than she normally did. "I'm glad that you're alright," she whispered, for only him to hear.  
  
Harry hugged her back feeling happiness for the first time in what seemed like forever. The feeling rushed over him quickly and it overwhelmed him. The sense of completeness that he felt when Hermione was hugging him was a feeling that he didn't want to let go. It was the best feeling that he had felt ever since he had seen Cedric Diggory die two years earlier. It seemed so long ago. A lifetime ago. A lifetime full of pain and sadness. But here, in the arms of his best friend, he could almost forget the pain.  
  
Hermione stepped back and Harry shook his head, wondering what had happened. It was a strange feeling. He felt as if he had been out in the sun for too long and now he was dizzy and disoriented. He managed another smile for his friends as they all started out the door. Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon had been standing the in the kitchen the entire time, watching them. Now, the decided to move, and Uncle Vernon looked furious.  
  
"If you take that boy now make sure that he never comes back! You lot just keep coming in here, thinking that you own the place. If you want him so bad, keep him and save us the hassle," Vernon said, feeling a burst of strength to stand up to a group of wizards.  
  
Mad-Eye Moony came forward then, standing face to face with Vernon. "The boy will return Dursley, and you will greet him with open arms. Everything has a reason, and there's a reason that Harry is staying with you. If you have a problem with that, feel free to take it up with me," he finished, staring Vernon down.  
  
Harry couldn't help but snigger at the expression on Uncle Vernon's face. All the bravery that he had mustered to stand up to them seemed to whoosh out of him in one breath and he was standing in the entranceway like a hippogriff caught in the sun.  
  
"Well, bye! I'll see you next summer I guess," Harry said, waving to them as they walked out the door. Looking out, he couldn't help but feel unsure. "I hope," he whispered under his breath. 


	4. In The Mist Part Four

I close my eyes  
  
And dream of you  
  
A dreamers love of night.  
  
The image of you  
  
Dancing in my mind  
  
Within my very core.  
  
I'm spinning around  
  
In a world of you  
  
Don't wake me up  
  
If this dream won't come true.  
  
---  
  
Harry, Hermione, and Ron sat in the back seat of a Ministry car that had been given to them. They were all traveling to the Burrow that way, now that the Ministry had finally accepted the truth about Voldemort. They were happy to offer all their services now to help the capture of the dark lord. The trip would take a few hours that way, but it was the best way that all of them could travel. Harry didn't really mind the trip either way. He was getting away from the Dursley's, and that's all that mattered.  
  
Harry stared at out the window, watching the cars travel in and out of impossibly small spaces, even though he never felt any change within the car itself. He was curious to know how it all work, how they managed to get the car in the spaces that they went. Harry smiled at the irony of the situation. He had fought Voldemort almost every year ever since he entered Hogwarts, yet he was still amazed when he saw some of the simple things that were a part of every day wizards lives. He wondered if there would ever be a day when he wouldn't be surprised with something new that he saw in the magical world, but he somehow doubted that he would.  
  
Harry turned and saw Hermione watching him carefully with concerned eyes. She blushed when their eyes caught each other and she turned away. Harry reached out to grab her hand before he had time to think about it. Hermione's head shot around to look at him, clearly surprised over his sudden action. It was Harry's turn to blush now, but as he went to pull his hand away, Hermione tightened her grip on it, not letting him go. Their eyes caught for a moment, and for that moment, Harry felt as if nothing he went though mattered as long as Hermione was with him.  
  
"So Harry, how were the Dursley's?" Ron asked, clearly unaware that he had interrupted a moment between both Harry and Hermione. They both jerked apart, as if they had been caught doing something more than simply holding hands.  
  
"Er.they were the same as normal. They pretty much just ignored me unless it was to make sure I was writing to Mad-Eye and to remind me that they were treating me kindly," Harry said, with an eye roll. He was trying desperately to sound normal, but the feeling Hermione had suddenly evoked in him had put him into a spin and he had developed a sudden and utter state of confusion.  
  
"I'm so sorry mate. I wish you could come and stay with us, but Dumbledore says you can't every time we ask. Don't think that we don't want you!" Ron said, looking over at Harry.  
  
Harry gave a small smile, but didn't say anything. Hermione and Ron didn't know why he had to go to the Dursley's, and he didn't know when he was ever going to tell them. The Prophecy, all that he now knew, it was all beginning to overwhelm him all again and he felt his chest tightening.  
  
As if sensing that Harry was about to have a breakdown, Hermione reached over and grabbed his hand tightly again. She looked him in the eyes, comforting him without saying a word.  
  
"It's alright Harry. You're not alone anymore. You have us. Whenever you want to talk to us, if you do, we're here," Hermione said, her voice soft and reassuring. It was a tone that she had used with him often, especially in the last year when he was angry and upset. Yet now, the tone seemed to feel a lot different, creating feelings that he never noticed were there before. What was wrong with him?  
  
Harry shook his head, trying to banish the thoughts of Hermione as more than a friend. He gave her a weak smile and continued sitting quietly, though not letting go of his hand. The conversation stopped after that, Ron noticing that he had said something that upset Harry and didn't want to cause him anymore problems. Eventually, Ron drifted off into a heavy sleep. Harry and Hermione were left awake, hearing only a soft snore coming from Ron's direction.  
  
"How are you, Harry?" Hermione asked, her voice soft so she wouldn't wake up Ron. "You've been distant from us the entire summer, and I feel as if I've missed out on so much of your life," Hermione added, squeezing his hand.  
  
Harry looked at her briefly before starting out the window. "I.I was in a bad place. I don't even know if I'm out of that place yet," Harry said with bitterness in his voice. "Why me, Hermione? Why in the world did I have to be the one that Voldemort went after? My whole life has been ruined by him, and he seems to be working harder and harder by the day to make it worse.  
  
"On top of that, I'm worried about the people that have become close to me. My friends.you. He knows that I care about you. That I would do anything for you.any of you, and he can take that to his advantage. He's taken Sirius away from me. Every day I'm petrified that I'm going to get an owl saying that you're dead.or Ron. I can't handle it. The though terrifies me and I don't know what to do! I can't imagine my life without you two in it, but I can't imagine forcing you to go through all that, simply because you made the mistake of becoming friends with me," Harry said, letting it all out suddenly in one breath. He sat back in shock. He hadn't expected all that to come out, and now he felt guilty. "I'm sorry. I didn't mea-"  
  
"Shhhhh," Hermione said, placing a finger over his lips. "First of all, we didn't make a mistake of being friends with you. We [i]want[/i] to be friends with you. Don't you think that we would have done something about it long ago if we had a problem? Being friends with you isn't always easy Harry, I'll admit that. But we both love you, and we care for you. We want to help you every step of the way because you are a great friend. We have fun together, we've spent the last five years together. Do you really think that we're going to stop being your friend just because you've gotten us into a little bit of trouble?" Hermione said, smiling.  
  
"It's been more than a 'bit of trouble,' Hermione. You two have both been hurt going off into fights with me. What if you two.what if you two get killed one day because of me?" Harry said, the last part coming out fast, as if he didn't even want to think about it, and he really didn't.  
  
"It's a chance that we're both willing to take, Harry. We know the consequences, and we'll live with them. That's not a problem to us."  
  
"But it is to me!" he replied, his voice slightly louder. "I don't even want to think about you two being killed because you were friends with me! It's not fair! I could never live with myself if that happened!"  
  
The thought was overwhelming, and Harry's eyes began to water. He turned quickly, not wanting her to see him like this. Hermione, however, didn't seem to care. She pulled his head toward her and looked him straight in the eyes, her own eyes tearing up.  
  
"Harry Potter, you listen to me and you listen close. Ron and I aren't going anywhere. After all, you're always around to protect us. Shush!" she said when he saw that he was about to protest. "I said listen. We're not worried about ourselves. We're more worried about losing [i]you.[/i] Where would [i]we[/i] be without you Harry? Where would I be?" she asked, the last part added in a whisper.  
  
"You'd make it. You and Ron are strong. If I was ever.killed," he choked out, "you two would be able to go on. You don't need me."  
  
"I need you Harry. I need you there for me. If you died.a large part of [i]me[/i] would die too," Hermione said, looking down at the end. She had just let out her heart. Over the past few weeks she had realized that her feelings for Harry weren't simply friendship feelings. She hadn't wanted to admit it before, but she knew that it was true. There was just something about him that made her want to protect him from the world, and kiss him senseless at the same time. She had begun to realize it when he said he had kissed Cho and she had to fight down strong feelings of jealously. Now, when he had distanced himself from them all, she realized it wasn't simply concern for a friend that had made her that worried and scared, but concerned for the one that she loved.  
  
Harry's head shot up with those words, and he stared into her eyes, trying to see something there, though Hermione didn't know what. She looked back at him, meeting him eye to eye. "What are you saying?" he asked, his voice hoarse and trembling.  
  
"I'm saying that I need you Harry. I'm saying that I don't want to be just your friend. I'm saying.I'm saying that I want to be more than your friend."  
  
There. She had let it all out. Now it was all simply up to him, and Hermione didn't have a clue how he was going to react.  
  
Harry say back in his seat, closing his eyes and not looking at Hermione for a moment. "What about Ron?"  
  
"What about Ron?" she asked, puzzled about what their other friend had to do with the situation. "He's still our friend."  
  
"Hermione, he likes you," Harry said, looking over at the sleeping figure next to Hermione. "He hasn't come out and said it yet, but I know that it's true. It's just something that I can tell. Don't tell me you haven't noticed it. That kiss you gave him before that match last year sent him off in dreamland for a week," Harry said, jealously creeping into his voice at the thought of the kiss.  
  
"Ron?" Hermione said, disbelief in her voice. She looked over at his sleeping form, shaking her head. "I really didn't know that. I had no idea! That kiss was just an encouragement for the game. I mean, I knew that he was nervous. I didn't know that he would take it as something more," she said, looking over at Ron again. "But Harry, that doesn't change anything, you know that, right?"  
  
"Hermione.can we do this? I mean.is it possible for you and I to have a relationship?" Harry asked, his voice soft and scared.  
  
"Do you like me Harry?"  
  
"What? Of course I like you Hermione. What kind of question is that?"  
  
"Harry, you know that I mean. Do you like me?"  
  
Harry stared at her, feeling a rush of new emotions pouring over him when he looked into her eyes. It was eerie, and undeniable. There was something there. Had it always been there? Had it simply been waiting for it's time to arise? It was so strange, and so strong. Something that hadn't been there with Cho. Cho had been lust. A simple crush. With Hermione, it was something stronger, something more plausible. And he nodded. Slowly at first, unsure, but it grew strong with time.  
  
"Yes. I do." 


	5. In The Mist Part Five

Authors Note: First off, I want to thank you all for all the feedback! I have to say that I'm surprised anyone found this story. I didn't think anyone would be interested, but your reviews proved otherwise!  
  
I want to address some issues before I go to the next part. Someone mentioned that they didn't like how I said that I didn't know where I was going with the story. I agree that it's not the most encouraging statement to start a story with, but it's the truth. Of course I have ideas, but with the way that I write it changes with every part. I don't want to give people a summary when it could change. I will finish this story. The parts won't be coming out fast, I'm afraid, but they will come out. I'm a student so I have a ton of school work to deal with, not to mention a board that I mod and am highly devoted too so there are some days when I have no time at all to write. But I have honest intentions to finish this. Oh! And Harry hasn't gotten over his depression immediately...he's just more aware at the moment.  
  
As for the signing reviews, I had no idea it was set like that! :D This is my first fic on this site, so I'm still trying to figure things out. Thanks for pointing that out though! I'm pretty sure that I fixed it. :)  
  
And now...on to the thing that you actually care about...part five. ;) I hope you like it and feedback would be great!  
  
----- I close my eyes  
  
And see you there  
  
It's never occurred to me before  
  
And suddenly  
  
My eyes are open  
  
And so is another door  
  
The past is there  
  
But so are you  
  
And you can guide me through  
  
In this darkness  
  
You're my light  
  
In this mist  
  
I'll fight the night.  
  
The conversation was ended suddenly when the car jolted to a stop and Hermione was thrown into Harry's arms. Ron woke suddenly, and Harry's door opened as Mrs. Weasley dragged him out, forcing him to let go of Hermione.  
  
"Oh Harry! I'm so happy that you're here!" she said, crushing him in a hug. Harry tried to say something, but all that was heard was a muffled groan. "I was so worried about you all summer long. The letters that you sent were just not reassuring in the least. I wanted you out of that household as soon as possible. Oh look at you," she said, finally giving Harry the chance to breath. "Have you eaten anything? You need some food. Come!"  
  
Mrs. Weasley tugged on Harry's hand and started toward the kitchen in the Burrow. Harry, not knowing what to do, followed after her. He had been afraid of how Mrs. Weasley was going to react to him after all that had happened the year before, and she seemed to think that doting on him like a little child was going to be the best solution. She hadn't done anything yet, but Harry could sense that the summer was going to be filled with a lot of concern for his well-being. More so than usual.  
  
Mrs. Weasley had already placed sandwiches on the table when Harry had entered and he sat down at the table. Behind him, Ron and Hermione came, along with Fred, George, and Ginny. The other members of the Order that had come with him were whispering hurriedly in the living room. For once, Harry had no desire to know what they were saying.  
  
"Eat up! All of you now. Here you go Harry dear," Molly said, placing three sandwiches on Harry's plate. He said thank you to her, knowing that if he didn't accept the food it wouldn't be a pretty sight. Looking down at it, he realized that he was actually a bit hungry. Food hadn't been important to him in the last weeks, but all of a sudden the hunger came back to him with a vengeance.  
  
Grabbing one of the sandwiches in front of him, Harry eagerly started eating and looked around the table, feeling a sudden burst of happiness that he was around people that loved him and that he loved. He knew that Remus was right. There were plenty of people that loved him. He sat quietly, eating slowly and looking at all the faces. Were they all in danger because of him? Would they still be in danger if he wasn't around? Would they still bother with the Order if Harry hadn't been so close wit them? The final question he thought that he knew the answer too. Harry didn't believe that any of them would sit back and do nothing as Voldemort gained power.  
  
He couldn't help but worry that he was putting them in more danger than they already were. He had an urge to get up from the table and run. Run away from them all and go after Voldemort right then and there so that they wouldn't have to be put through any pain or trouble, but he knew that wasn't possible. He was no where near ready to face Voldemort in a fight to the death. Harry was sure that he would be the one to come out dead. Still, he didn't feel safe at the Burrow. He was a target. There were people constantly looking for him. Why was he sitting at a place filled with loved ones? He was better off at the Dursley's. At least the entire place wasn't filled with his loved ones.  
  
Harry was about to open his mouth and tell them all that he was going back to the Dursley's for the rest of the summer and stay away from them all. His mouth snapped shut though when he caught Hermione's eyes. She had been silent too the entire lunch, but now she was looking at him as if she knew what she was thinking. The look that she gave him clearly said that she knew what Harry was planning and she wasn't going to let him do it. Harry slouched back in his chair, knowing that she knew him better than anyone and that she was right. He couldn't do it. No one would let him even if he wanted too. Harry wouldn't be surprised if a guard was appointed to him just to make sure that he didn't do anything stupid. He hadn't been the ideal example of smart choices in the past.  
  
Lunch continued on, no one noticing the exchange between Harry and Hermione. No one, that is, except Ron who had noticed the glances that had been shared between Hermione and Harry but chose to shrug them off. Harry now seemed to be engrossed in hearing how Fred and George were doing with their business that they had begun the moment that they left Hogwarts. They had bought a small building in Diagon Alley and had just opened it the week before. Already their store was making a ton of business and Molly couldn't help but be proud of her two sons who she was convinced wouldn't make it. She seemed to have forgotten the fact that the twins had dropped out of school early and didn't care where the original money came from for the store.  
  
When all was over, Harry snuck out the back door, hoping to get some time to himself. He had spent the last weeks in the seclusion in his room and in his mind the solitude became all there was. Now, the sudden integration into the real world was slowly beginning to pierce his control and he wasn't sure how much more he could take of being surrounded constantly. He gave Mrs. Weasley a reassuring smile as he ducked out and started walking in the fields behind the house. His hands were in his pockets, his head down, completely blocking out the world around him. Quiet. It was just the way that he liked it. All the noise that was a part of everyday life at the Burrow seemed to be something that he couldn't handle anymore. It was too hard. Too hard to pretend that he was normal and didn't have any problems, and too hard to keep everyone assured that he was fine when he really wasn't. He needed a break and he had only been there for a few hours.  
  
Harry sighed stopping and collapsed on the grass. He lay backwards and closed his eyes, taking deep breaths as he tried to level himself. He couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. Normally, being at the Weasley's was the best time of his life and he couldn't wait to spend time with Ron and his family...and Hermione. Hermione. What had happened? Did she really say that she like liked him? Did he really say that he like liked her? What was wrong with him? There was no way that anything could happen between them. It was bad enough Voldemort knew that they were best friends, but if he knew that Harry loved Hermione? Well that was that.  
  
Harry did a double take as he thought over his words. Love. Loved Hermione. He was loosing it. There was no way anything could work out!  
  
"I won't let her get hurt," he whispered out loud.  
  
"Well I hope that you're not going out just letting people get hurt Harry Potter."  
  
Harry jumped up at the voice that was suddenly next to him. He knew the voice. He also should have known that Hermione wasn't just going to let him leave the Burrow like that and leave him alone. It would have been too easy.  
  
"Herm-"  
  
"I don't want to hear it Harry. I know what you're thinking, and we went over it before. My feelings for you aren't going to change, and I don't think that yours are going to change either. Don't you think that you could protect me better if you were closer to me?"  
  
Harry blinked. The thought hadn't occurred to him before, but now that she mentioned it, it did make sense. The closer that he was to Hermione, the more that he would be able to do to help her because he would know what she was doing and where she was. He nodded to himself, seeing the logic. And then he smiled. The most real smile that had passed over his face since the world of the prophecy and Voldemort came crashing over him.  
  
"Yea...yea, I guess that makes sense," Harry said, looking down into Hermione's eyes. He had finally gotten taller over the summer and it was amazing to be able to look down into Hermione's eyes and see them filled with emotion for him.  
  
"Good Mr. Potter, because I wasn't going to take no for an answer," Hermione said, tears in her eyes. She had almost lost him again before she even had him.  
  
"Shh....don't cry Hermione," Harry whispered, brushing away her tears. He looked at her lips, suddenly realizing that he could actually kiss her. He could, couldn't he? "Can I...can I kiss you Hermione?"  
  
"You better," she sniffled, looking up at him.  
  
Harry stared at her lips. It was so different than with Cho. He was nervous, but it was the nervous sense of anticipation rather than fear. And he was excited because he knew that nothing could go wrong with the kiss because it was him and Hermione. Slowly leaned in, he brushed his lips slightly against hers at first. Seeing that she didn't run away, he kissed her again, this time longer with more pressure. They stood there kissing for a few moments, quiet moans being the only sound that was heard. It was perfect. Too perfect.  
  
----- Short part, I know. Sorry! But I had to break it off somewhere and I thought that there was a good part. Don't hurt me! ;) Next part should be out soon. 


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